I’ll start this with full honesty. I think I’ve only read one of these books from start to finish. Hey, if you have young kids, you get it. My book reading pace is about one page a night, in bed, before my eyes start closing from pure exhaustion.
I’m not sure if this is by design, but most parenting books don’t need to be read cover to cover. You won’t agree with everything in one single parenting book. Your instincts and intuition matter and will help you cherry pick relevant information from the books. You and I could read the exact same parenting book and have totally different takeaways.
I don’t think my parents or my husbands parents read any parenting books and clearly we turned out fine (kidding, mostly). However, I think it helps to gain insight from people who have seen hundreds or thousands of kids and recognize behavior patterns, phases, study different approaches, and suggest solutions.
Why didn’t our parents read parenting books? There’s a famous saying that “kids don’t come with instructions manuals”, yet there are thousands of parenting books available. First, their parents didn’t read parenting books, so it likely did not occur to them. But times change. Their parents had one parent (their dad) who worked outside of the home and one parent (their mom) stayed home. They also had many more siblings. Kids learn from one another. Family units were larger and closer and times were simpler. So our parents’ generation didn’t read the books but now both parents are working outside the home (more likely) and families are smaller. The same approach as their parents’ generation is less successful.
I don’t mean this to be a knock on our parents at all! We have the most incredible parents, and we’re grateful that we and our kids get to spend a lot of time with them. I do think, though, that the approach needs to change and parenting books give us the opportunity to better understand our children and how to guide them, discipline them, and foster their growth.
Now that I’ve made a short story long… here’s my list:
1. Happiest Baby on the Block by Dr. Harvey Karp
This is the best for sleep and colick prevention. Read this BEFORE baby comes into your life. Absolutely love this book.
2. Making the Terrible Twos Terrific by John Rosemond
More of an old-school approach. Simple and effective. No woo-woo stuff.
3. Oh Crap! Potty Training by Jamie Glowacki
Jame Glowacki has helped hundreds of families with potty training. Her method helped us get our toddler potty trained before he turned 2!
4. Oh Crap! I have a Toddler by Jamie Glowacki
She has a straightforward approach. Some woo-woo stuff, but it’s good. Helps you figure out what will work most specifically for your family. Not a one-size-fits-all approach.
5. No Bad Kids by Janet Lansbury
Okay I haven’t actually finished this one (yet), but it’s well known in the parenting world. Focuses on respectful parenting and brings a bounty of experience with children.
I’m hoping this is a list that I can add to over the years. The best advice I can give you is to read different approaches and pick and choose what makes the most sense to you and your family. You don’t have to agree with EVERYTHING in a book to get some really good nuggets out of it. If something goes against your instincts and doesn’t feel right for you, then don’t apply it to your parenting. Use these as tools but trust your instincts.
What are your favorite parenting books that I need to check out??
